Sadness holds me down

6 months to 2026.

Has everything I have done come to nought?

What is success? What are achievements?

How do we count our trophies?

Do we think that what we do is important or even has a lasting impact? or is it for vanity or vanities?

Who will comfort us when we are down? Who will bear our sorrows? Our burdens?

Can I count on others? Can I trust others?

Pouring my heart out leaves me hurt when nothing comes back.Why do I bother?

I will shut the doors to my heart, draw a line and build a wall around me to avoid myself from being hurt time and time again.

I sought to be understood in my youth. I sought to be heard. I sought to be recognized. I sought an identity worth living for. I sought a connection with this world just to realise that it is an illusion, a mistake, a confusion.

 

Have I transformed into what I detest? Do i need to go?